Discover the complete story of Ethan Slater wife marriage, their 2023 divorce, and family life. Learn about their high school romance, their son, and the controversial circumstances surrounding their split amid Ethan’s relationship with Ariana Grande in 2026.
Quick Facts: Ethan Slater & Lilly Jay
| Category | Details |
| Ethan Slater Full Name | Ethan Samuel Slater |
| Date of Birth | June 2, 1992 |
| Age (2026) | 33 years old |
| Profession | Broadway Actor, Singer |
| Lilly Jay Full Name | Dr. Lilly Jay |
| Lilly Jay Age | 32-33 years old (born 1992) |
| Lilly Jay Profession | Clinical Psychologist (Perinatal Mental Health) |
| Marriage Date | November 2018 |
| Divorce Filed | July 26, 2023 |
| Divorce Finalized | September 13, 2024 |
| Children | One son (born August 2022) |
| Current Relationship Status | Ethan dating Ariana Grande (since 2023) |
Understanding the Ethan Slater and Lilly Jay Story
The relationship between Broadway star Ethan Slater and clinical psychologist Lilly Jay has captured public attention since their highly publicized divorce in 2023. What began as a high school romance evolved into marriage and parenthood, only to end amid widespread media scrutiny when Slater began dating his Wicked co-star Ariana Grande. In 2026, this story continues to resonate as Lilly Jay has begun speaking publicly about her experience, offering a deeply personal perspective on navigating divorce in the public eye.
This comprehensive article explores the complete timeline of Ethan Slater and Lilly Jay’s relationship, from their teenage years through their marriage, the birth of their son, and the circumstances surrounding their divorce. We examine both perspectives in this story and provide verified information about their family situation as of 2026.
Who is Ethan Slater? Background and Career
Ethan Samuel Slater was born on June 2, 1992, in Washington, D.C., making him 33 years old in 2026. Raised in a Jewish family in Silver Spring, Maryland, Slater experienced significant loss early in life when his mother passed away when he was just seven years old. This experience profoundly shaped him and influenced his artistic sensitivity.
Slater graduated from Georgetown Day School and went on to study drama at Vassar College in Poughkeepsie, New York, earning his Bachelor of Arts degree in 2014. It was during his college years that he would meet Lilly Jay, the woman who would become his wife.
His breakthrough came in 2016 when he was cast as SpongeBob SquarePants in the Broadway musical adaptation. His performance earned him a Tony Award nomination for Best Actor in a Musical and won him Drama Desk and Outer Critics Circle Awards. This role established him as a talented Broadway performer with a bright future ahead.
In December 2022, Slater landed what would become his most prominent film role: Boq in the two-part Wicked film adaptation directed by Jon M. Chu. This role would not only elevate his career but also change his personal life dramatically when he began working alongside Ariana Grande, who played Glinda.
Ethan Slater wife Lilly Jay Biography: Education and Professional Career
Dr. Lilly Jay, born in 1992, is a highly accomplished clinical psychologist specializing in perinatal mental health and child development. Growing up in Maryland, Jay demonstrated a commitment to helping others from an early age, which led her to pursue psychology as her life’s work.
Jay attended Amherst College, where she earned her undergraduate degree before pursuing her doctorate in clinical psychology. Her professional focus centers on women’s mental health, particularly during the vulnerable postpartum period. She has worked at prestigious institutions including Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia, where she supported women pregnant with babies facing severe or fatal diagnoses.
Beyond her clinical work, Lilly Jay has been an outspoken advocate for sexual assault awareness and prevention. In 2014, she delivered a powerful speech at the White House as part of the It’s On Us campaign, with then-President Barack Obama and Vice President Joe Biden in attendance. Her advocacy work demonstrates her dedication to creating positive social change beyond her clinical practice.
Jay serves on the medical board of Riley, a science-backed parenting platform designed to support new parents. Her expertise in perinatal psychology makes her a valued resource in helping families navigate the challenges of early parenthood. According to interviews, Jay has intentionally maintained a low social media profile to protect her professional boundaries and ensure patient privacy.
Ethan Slater Marriage to Lilly Jay: A High School Romance
Ethan Slater and Lilly Jay’s love story began in their teenage years. The couple met when they were approximately 13 years old and developed a friendship that eventually blossomed into romance. According to reports, they began dating in 2013 after several years of friendship, making them high school sweethearts in the truest sense.
Their relationship continued through college, with both attending Vassar College, where their bond deepened. After dating for several years and supporting each other through their early career development, the couple married in November 2018 in what appeared to be a loving commitment to their shared future.
During their marriage, Slater publicly expressed his love and admiration for his wife. In a November 2022 Instagram post celebrating their fourth anniversary, he wrote affectionately about Jay, calling her his best friend and noting they had been together for ten years at that point. He described that year as the best and most bizarre yet, unknowingly foreshadowing the dramatic changes that would come.
The couple appeared to have a supportive partnership, with Jay backing Slater’s theatrical career while building her own successful psychology practice. Friends and observers described them as devoted to each other, making the eventual dissolution of their marriage all the more surprising to those who knew them.
Ethan Slater Son: Becoming Parents in 2022
In August 2022, Ethan Slater and Lilly Jay welcomed their first child, a son whose name has been kept private to protect his identity. The arrival of their baby represented what seemed to be the fulfillment of their family dreams. For Jay, who had dedicated her career to maternal and child health, becoming a mother was a profoundly meaningful experience.
However, the pregnancy and birth were not without complications. In her December 2024 essay for The Cut, Jay revealed that she survived preeclampsia, a potentially life-threatening pregnancy complication characterized by high blood pressure. Despite this frightening experience, she described feeling that their family was finally whole once their son arrived.
The timing of their son’s birth would prove significant. Just four months after becoming parents, in December 2022, Slater began filming Wicked in England. Jay made the monumental decision to move to another country with her two-month-old infant to support her husband’s career opportunity. As a perinatal psychologist, she was acutely aware of the statistics about how vulnerable marriages are during the postpartum period and how important community support is for preventing depression and anxiety.
Despite her professional knowledge about these risks, Jay chose to prioritize her husband’s career advancement. In her essay, she wrote about being consumed by the magic and mundanity of new motherhood during this period, not initially recognizing the growing distance developing between her and Slater as he worked on the Wicked production.
As of 2026, their son is approximately three years old. Both Slater and Jay have committed to co-parenting their child, with Jay emphasizing in her public statements that while their partnership has changed, their dedication to parenting has not. She has written that both parents fiercely love their son one hundred percent of the time, regardless of how parenting time is divided.
Ethan Slater Divorce: Timeline and Circumstances
The dissolution of Ethan Slater and Lilly Jay’s marriage unfolded rapidly and publicly in the summer of 2023, shocking many who knew the couple as devoted high school sweethearts. The timeline of events reveals a painful sequence that left Jay feeling blindsided and thrust into an unwanted spotlight.
In May 2023, Slater publicly celebrated Lilly Jay on her first Mother’s Day, posting affectionate messages on social media that gave no indication of marital problems. However, according to sources who spoke to Us Weekly, Slater sat Jay down just a few days before the news broke in late July 2023 and informed her that he wanted a divorce.
On July 17, 2023, reports emerged that Ariana Grande had separated from her husband, Dalton Gomez, after two years of marriage. Sources indicated they had been separated since January 2023. Just three days later, on July 20, 2023, multiple outlets confirmed that Grande and Slater had begun dating. The proximity of these announcements immediately sparked speculation about the timeline and nature of their relationship.
On July 26, 2023, Slater officially filed for divorce from Jay in New York. The filing came just one month before their son’s first birthday, adding another layer of heartbreak to an already devastating situation. The specific grounds for divorce were not made public, and the date of separation listed in the documents has not been disclosed.
Jay broke her silence on July 27, 2023, in a statement to Page Six. Her words were brief but powerful, describing Ariana Grande as not being a girl’s girl and stating that she and her son were collateral damage in the situation. Jay emphasized that her focus was on rebuilding a life for her son and herself.
The divorce was finalized on September 13, 2024, more than a year after Slater initially filed. The terms of their custody arrangement and financial settlement have not been made public, maintaining some privacy for their son’s sake. Throughout the divorce proceedings, Jay largely remained silent publicly, processing her grief privately while caring for their young child.
Ethan Slater and Ariana Grande: The Controversial Romance
The relationship between Ethan Slater and Ariana Grande emerged as one of the most scrutinized celebrity romances of 2023 and continues to attract attention in 2026. The couple met on the set of Wicked, where Grande played Glinda the Good Witch and Slater portrayed Boq, a Munchkin character who harbors unrequited love for Glinda.
Production on Wicked began in December 2022 in England. During this time, both Grande and Slater were still married to their respective spouses. According to various sources, the co-stars frequently socialized with the entire cast at parties and dinners. Some reports even indicate that Grande and Slater spent time together as couples with their then-spouses, with Grande allegedly meeting and holding Slater and Jay’s newborn baby.
When news of their relationship broke in July 2023, speculation immediately arose about whether Grande and Slater had been involved romantically before ending their marriages. Representatives for both stars maintained that they did not begin dating until after both had separated from their spouses. However, sources quoted by Us Weekly alleged that the pair were not careful on set, reportedly holding hands between takes and generally being indiscreet.
The public reaction was swift and largely negative. Social media users criticized both Grande and Slater, with particular scrutiny falling on Grande given her celebrity status and the fact that Slater had a newborn son at home. The term home wrecker began circulating, and many accused the couple of being dishonest about the timeline of their relationship.
In September 2024, Grande addressed the controversy in an interview with Vanity Fair. She expressed disappointment that so many people believed the worst version of events and defended Slater passionately. Grande stated there could not be a less accurate depiction of a human being than what tabloids portrayed about Slater, emphasizing that no one on earth tries harder or spreads themselves thinner to be there for the people he loves and cares about.
Slater also spoke to the situation in an October 2024 GQ interview, acknowledging it had been a really super big year and expressing difficulty with having his private life commented on and scrutinized by the public. He did not provide specific details about the timeline or circumstances of his relationship with Grande.
As of 2026, Grande and Slater remain together and have been photographed at various events, including the Wicked premiere and promotional tour. They have been seen with Grande’s father and appear to be in a committed relationship. Sources have indicated that Slater was eager to finalize his divorce so he could potentially propose to Grande, though no engagement has been announced publicly.
Lilly Jay’s Perspective: Speaking Out in 2024
After more than a year of silence following her initial statement to Page Six, Lilly Jay published a deeply personal essay in The Cut on December 19, 2024, titled How Does My Divorce Make You Feel. The piece provided her most extensive public comments on the end of her marriage and offered insight into her experience navigating divorce in the shadow of her husband’s new relationship with a celebrity.
Jay began her essay with a striking statement reflecting on her expectations for her life and marriage. She wrote that no one gets married thinking they will get divorced, in the same way we don’t board a plane expecting to crash. She emphasized that she really never thought she would get divorced, especially not just after giving birth to her first child and especially not in the shadow of her husband’s new relationship with a celebrity.
Throughout the essay, Jay did not name Slater, Grande, or Wicked specifically, but the references were clear. She described days with her son as sunny but noted that days when she could not escape the promotion of a movie associated with the saddest days of her life were darker. This reference to the Wicked promotional campaign, which was in full swing during late 2024, highlighted the ongoing difficulty of having her private pain connected to such a public and celebrated project.
Jay opened up about the professional impact of her unwanted public profile. As a psychologist who had carefully cultivated a private practice and avoided social media to maintain appropriate boundaries with patients, the sudden tabloid attention disrupted her carefully constructed professional life. She described hints that her career had been impacted, including a job offer that dissolved without explanation after yet another tabloid news cycle and a patient who scheduled a first appointment but seemingly vanished.
The essay also revealed Jay’s internal struggle with having any degree of public voice. In a May 2024 Glamour interview, she had mentioned actively trying to figure out what it means to have a voice she sort of stumbled into and didn’t really ask for. Her December essay seemed to represent a decision to use that unwanted platform to share her truth.
Despite the pain evident in her writing, Jay’s essay concluded on a note of hope and resilience. She wrote that slowly but surely, she has come to believe that in the absence of the life she planned with her high school sweetheart, a lifetime of sweetness is waiting for her and her child. She emphasized that while her partnership with Slater has changed, their parenthood has not, with both parents fiercely loving their son regardless of how parenting time is divided.
The public response to Jay’s essay was overwhelmingly supportive. Many readers praised her eloquence, strength, and vulnerability. Social media users expressed sympathy for her situation and admiration for her ability to articulate the complex emotions of navigating public divorce while maintaining focus on her child and her healing.
Ethan Slater Family: Co-Parenting Arrangements in 2026
As of 2026, Ethan Slater and Lilly Jay continue to navigate co-parenting their young son, who is now approximately three years old. While specific details of their custody arrangement remain private, both parents have publicly committed to prioritizing their child’s well-being above their personal differences.
In September 2025, Slater was photographed spending time with Jay and their son at the Newport Mall in Jersey City, New Jersey. An eyewitness described seeing Slater pushing a stroller and appearing happy, while Jay walked nearby helping the child with a toy wagon. The scene suggested that despite their divorce, the former couple can come together for their son’s sake and maintain a cordial co-parenting relationship.
Jay lives in downtown Jersey City, a neighborhood known for being family-friendly while remaining close to Broadway, making it convenient for Slater to visit during his theatrical work in New York. Locals have reportedly seen Slater in the area on multiple occasions, suggesting regular involvement in his son’s daily life.
In her writings, Jay has emphasized that her primary focus is on being the best mother she can be and building a happy, stable life for her son. She has spoken about the countless hours spent rocking her son to sleep, pushing his stroller, and marveling at his development. These moments with her child appear to provide her with joy and purpose as she rebuilds her life post-divorce.
For his part, Slater has been described by Grande as someone who tries harder than anyone and spreads himself thin to be there for the people he loves and cares about. While he has not spoken publicly in detail about his co-parenting arrangement, his presence at family outings and Grande’s characterization suggest active involvement in his son’s life.
The integration of Grande into this family dynamic remains a sensitive topic. There have been no public statements or photographs showing Grande with Slater’s son, suggesting that the adults involved may be taking a cautious approach to blending their lives for the child’s sake. Jay’s initial statement calling herself and her son collateral damage indicates the complexity and pain involved in this situation.
Where Are They Now? Ethan Slater and Lilly Jay in 2026
As 2026 progresses, both Ethan Slater and Lilly Jay have moved forward with their separate lives while maintaining their commitment to co-parenting their son. Their paths have diverged significantly from the shared future they once envisioned as high school sweethearts.
Ethan Slater’s career continues to flourish. The massive success of Wicked, which premiered in November 2024, has elevated his profile significantly. He reprises his role as Boq in Wicked: For Good, the second part of the film adaptation, which is scheduled for release in 2025. His relationship with Ariana Grande remains ongoing, and they have been seen together at various high-profile events throughout the Wicked promotional campaign and beyond.
Lilly Jay has begun to reclaim her narrative and rebuild her life following the divorce. Her December 2024 essay in The Cut marked a turning point in her public presence, allowing her to share her perspective after remaining largely silent for over a year. She continues her work as a clinical psychologist specializing in perinatal mental health, though she has acknowledged the professional challenges created by her unwanted public profile.
Jay’s advocacy work continues as well. She remains involved in maternal health initiatives and serves on the medical board of Riley, the parenting platform. Her expertise in supporting women through the vulnerable postpartum period takes on additional resonance given her own experience of navigating new motherhood while her marriage dissolved.
The Wicked phenomenon continues to be both a source of professional success for Slater and a painful reminder for Jay. As promotional materials and merchandise remain ubiquitous, Jay’s comments about darker days when she cannot escape the movie associated with the saddest days of her life remain relevant. The second Wicked film’s release will likely bring another wave of publicity that may prove challenging for her.
Their son, now a toddler, continues to be the central focus for both parents. While the specifics of their custody arrangement remain private, both Slater and Jay have indicated their commitment to providing their child with love and stability. Jay has written about her belief that a lifetime of sweetness awaits her and her child, suggesting an optimistic outlook despite the painful circumstances of her divorce.
The public continues to follow this story with interest, particularly as Grande and Slater navigate their relationship in the spotlight. Social media discourse remains divided, with some supporting the couple’s right to happiness and others maintaining criticism based on the circumstances of how their relationship began.
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Conclusion: Lessons from a Public Divorce
The story of Ethan Slater, Lilly Jay, and their divorce represents more than celebrity gossip. It illuminates the profound challenges of navigating relationship dissolution in the public eye, the vulnerability of marriages during the postpartum period, and the resilience required to rebuild one’s life after unexpected heartbreak.
For Lilly Jay, the experience transformed her from a private mental health professional into an unwilling public figure. Her journey from devastation to finding her voice and advocating for herself demonstrates remarkable strength. Her willingness to share her story may help other women facing similar situations feel less alone in their experiences.
For Ethan Slater, the situation highlighted the complex intersection of professional opportunity and personal relationships. While his career has reached new heights, the circumstances surrounding his divorce and new relationship have affected his public image and will likely remain a part of his narrative going forward.
Most importantly, this story serves as a reminder that behind every headline are real people experiencing genuine pain, joy, and everything in between. The couple’s son, now growing up in a split household, represents the future and the ongoing connection between his parents regardless of their romantic relationship status.
As 2026 continues, Ethan Slater and Lilly Jay move forward on their separate paths, united only by their shared commitment to their child. Their story remains a testament to the unpredictability of life and the importance of resilience in the face of unexpected change.
